The Bower Blog

Loyalty-my favourite trait

I've had the same old friends for years and years.  One group is called "the Bits and Bites".  We're a little bit of this, a little bit of that.  They are a strong group of dynamite women, in various stages of life, careers and family.  We are circular in our loyalty to one another.  When there are problems, there is always someone with an ear.  When there is joy, also rejoicing and happiness with them.  Business flows in a circular motion too.  I love that two of my women friends, Financial Planners, always think of me when someone is interested in buying, selling or simply in need of some real estate counselling.  I also try to send as many people their way as possible as well.  They are loyal, true and blue, honest and can always be relied on.  One of these friends used to lament about being "dependable and bendable".  I told her (more than once) it was and is the most admirable trait and was not something to be critical of herself for.  I love that she is dependable and can see more than one side in a situation. I also love that she has never offered unsolicited advice-always asks permission if I want her opinion.  I have come to do that too with friends.  Most often, people really just want to be listened to. 

Yesterday I helped out a dear friend in a real estate transaction.  As realtors we all have good years and not so good years.  I was so happy for her yesterday, simply because she was successful in a transaction.  I loved the way she spoke to her clients and am excited the day worked out well for her.  How often she has rejoiced in my success the past few years.

When we were on holidays this summer, a few pieces of business went through the cracks for Mr. Davidson.  I followed up with a few agents to apologize.  One agent sent a note back. "I will never use another company...ever".  I told her it was my favourite thing about her...her loyalty and true blueness.

Loyalty is undervalued; there are many sayings where this falls in to play.

"whatever goes around comes around"

"you reap what you sow"

Loyalty, integrity....my favourites.

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood.....

When we were "tweens" (that incredibly awkward age between 12 and 14/15), my gang and I would get together and watch our favourite shows.  At that time it included "The Monkees", "The Partridge Family" and as a parody, we would watch "Mr. Roger's Neighbourhood".  His music..."It's a beautiful day in the neighbourhood, a beautiful day for a neighbour, would you be mine, could you be mine." Not only did we know the Monkee songs and Partridge Family songs, but we knew Mr. Roger's too.  There was something so simple about his neighbourhood; people being kind and hospitable.  Helpful, too!  Years later I would tune into Saturday Night Live and see parodies of Fred Rogers.  They made fun of that show much like we did when we were younger.

As I've matured (some may think differently, but I actually have!) I look at my own neighbourhood and circle of friends and count myself very lucky indeed to be the kind of person who likes to contribute to a community and also surround myself with like-minded people.  Often we have no control over who lives next door to us; I've been so lucky everywhere I've lived in my adult life.  Neighbours pitching in when we're on holidays; helping a few times when I was sick; looking out for my rebel son when he was a tween-the list goes on.  My friends, too, are treasures.  One email last week generated $950.00 toward my favourite charity, the Teresa Group. 

We live in a fast paced society.  The biggest tragedy is we don't spend enough time with our friends and neighbours, doing things we used to do, like sit out on a porch and talk or grow a garden and chat over the neighbour's fence.  I miss simpler days and wish I had more down time with pals.

www.CherylBower.com

Cheryl Bower

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

A little bit of this, a little bit 'o that!

Strong Sales Increases Continue in August

Toronto:  In August 2009, Greater Toronto REALTORS reported 8,035 sales, up 27% from August 2008.  The average price for August transactions was $387,921-up by 6% compared to the same month last year.

"The increase in demand for existing homes has been widespread across different housing types and price ranges," said TREB president Tom Lebour.  "This suggests many categories of home buyers have chosen to make a long-term investment in housing, from first-time buyers to move-up buyers or buyers who are seeking a lifestyle change."

Year-to-date sales, at 58,421 were up 2% compared to the first eight months of 2008. 

"We have heard more positive economic news lately.  The improved housing market has played a key role," explains Jason Mercer, TREB's senior Manager of Market Analysis.  "Home sales have helped other sectors of the economy through home buyers' spending on things like financial and legal services, moving, renovations and home furnishings."

On Another Note.....

This weekend, the Cabbagetown Fall Festival commences (Friday September 11 through to Sunday September 13).  The event includes craft and art sales, lots of food, entertainment (our own Duncan Fremlin and his band Whiskey Jack are playing at 5 p.m. on Saturday).  The fair takes places on Parliament Street and includes Riverdale Farm and the surrounding park area.  Also for those "home freaks" there is a tour of homes on both Saturday and Sunday.  I'll update this post once I have times and locations of everything.

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

Neat things I like in Toronto

Been doing a lot of driving lately; that's what we do when we're realtors, drive around, looking at property, showing property, meeting in cafes or gyms or meeting standing up at a hot dog stand.  Anyway, I digress.  While driving the other day, I thought about that big sign I've seen on the Gardiner- INGLIS Appliances, and how they always have wonderful, enlightening captions to ponder on the way home.  That sign has been there for as long as I can remember as a kid.  It always had something interesting to say.  Today?  "Don't judge people by their relatives; judge them only for who they are."  Profound.  How often have we made an ascertion about someone and then, out of the blue, they surprise you with something that they do or say and it changes your whole perspective of them.  Now some people are just plain ugly inside; negative, sarcastic, unhappy.  We all know them and for me, I just ignore or disregard.  Life's too short.  Generally speaking, people are good and kind if you are that way with them.  What goes around, comes around. 

Another muse I had today was how this city was empty this past weekend, except for the Lakeshore!  Driving around Bayview/Eglinton...nobody.  Driving around Scarborough to see some clients....nada, zip.  There is nothing like the void in this city of a long weekend.  We should have them more often.

Do you want to escape and go to another country without leaving Toronto?  How many pockets in this city feature wonderful eateries and culture from around the world.  Little Italy (College Street), Little India (Coxwell and Gerrard), Ukranian and Polish culture on Roncesvalles.  Wonderful.  If you'd like it all in one place, try World of Food at Harbourfront on the weekends.  10 different countries under one tent.  Watch the kids break dance in the Kid Zone, watch the sail boats go by.  Spend some time with the family and revel in this wonderful city.  Peace, out.

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

Different Day, different Mood

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

Life, Love and the whole darn thing

One of my favourite sayings in a movie was, again in Jerry McGuire.  Jerry was speaking about living in a cynical world and the Renee Zellwegger character saying she "didn't know what to say to her kid about this world or the people in it."  Jerry had had an 'AH, HA' moment and written a mission statement (everyone in the movie called it a memo).

Here's the questions I ask myself every day. 

1.  What's important?  I mean really important?  Once they push the dirt on you, is it going to matter a hill of beans that you lost a deal, or you lost money in the stock market or you broke a nail.....My importance?  My kid.  Want him to be happy; want him to know he's loved dearly and beyond measure.

2.  At the end of the day have I done what is right by others?  This is a key question.  Recently a friend asked me why we weren't as close to one another as we used to be.  I asked her if she wanted the truth.  She affirmed that she did.  I said I thought that she had a lot of time on her hands and consequently her focus was only on herself.  She agreed about the time on her hands and proceeded to tell me for 3 hours how bad her life was.  I'm of the mind that life is what we ourselves create.  If we do right, if we help others, if we look for good in everything we do, then we have lived a successful life.   There are dark days when this is a challenge.  There are always people who have it worse than we do.  Always. 

3. Have I put myself out there, whether it be to help, listen or contribute?  Have I done that?  For me there are a couple ways to contribute to society.  The demographic I used to work extensively with were seniors.  DId you know that sometime listening to a person (senior or otherwise) can change their day, their outlook, their life?  Did you know that?  I do.  They've told me.  One li'll old lady was venting one day; I listened and she told me afterwards that this simple gesture of lending an ear, changed how she did things.  She joined the local church at Pape and O'Connor, she took up bicycle riding and became a volunteer.  Astonishing, really.  Myself, I like volunteerism for the simple reason of getting out of my own head and my own problems.  For years I worked the front desk at the Hospital for Sick Children as a volunteer.  Then I worked up on the heart floor providing love and care for sick babies or children so their mom or dad could have a break and rest.  I met the most astonishing little boy, Quincey.  I still have a picture of him in my office.  He called me "Yellow" because he couldn't say Cheryl (plus I wore a yellow protective gown-it was fitting)  When I worked with Quincey, I was going through a trying period with my son.  For 3 hours a week, I didn't have to think about problems, only what Quincey needed.  Thank you Quincey; you saved my bacon.

Finally, here's my favour poem, which is (inaccurately) attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson.  I don't know who wrote it, but I love it.

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

 

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

Heros in My Life

I love knowing people who stand for something.  I respect people who have courage and bravery and can stand alone while facing an adversary and be absolutely right.  I love grace under pressure.  I adore a good belly laugh. I'll give you some stories for the weekend.

I was at a meeting the other day; it was a meeting whereby people had been delivered some very bad news.  The person delivering this news took "hits" from about 30 in a room of 80 or so, people. They would not allow him to complete a sentence, hence the meeting was chaos almost from the get-go.  This man stood there and took it.  He believes strongly that he is correct on an issue (the issue has to do with money, the greatest reason besides religion people fight anyway) and he was courageous and brave.  Did he win?  I think he did because he did not stand down.  He held his own.

I left my son a text message the other day (love text messaging, so instant and I've just gotten the hang of it).  The message was: "Having a brutal week, need the company of my love child".  He phoned me right after and asked me if everything was okay.  I, of course started crying because it had in effect, been a brutal week.  He said, "Ma, what's wrong? I'm coming to Toronto...."  I said it was okay, just feeling a bit weak and I'd hook up with him Sunday.  Love my son's compassion-he's been like that since he was a short one.

My sister has a seriously ill husband and a disabled child.  Every day is a challenge for her family.  My sister, Michele personifies grace under pressure.  She is also my belly-laugh friend.  We have wickedly similar senses of humour; I am proud of her beyond measure.  Jerry McGuire said it best "you complete me".  Michele, my sister, my self, "you complete me."  Love you forever.

 

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

Reading=Love=Escape=Adventure=Peace=Empowerment

When I was a young girl, I had to wear corrective glasses for one eye that liked to wander.  A few years ago while I was cleaning out my dad's personals after he died, I found a picture he had taken in our basement of me with these gigantic glasses on.  I'm not sure why he kept that picture; it was not flattering but there was a vulnerability to it that, looking back, touched me as an adult woman. 

My passion is those days was reading; I would spend hours upon hours escaping an increasingly chaotic and unhappy home life.  Reading provided a respite from it all and with a flashlight, I would delve into books into the wee hours of the night.  I had every Nancy Drew hard cover available and for humour, the Pipi Longstocking series were hilarious.  She was something else. 

This year, my reading has gone to the wayside; I have been extraordinarily busy with my job, family and outside projects.  It has been much easier to turn on the television and surf than to hunker down and curl with a book.  While surfing last night, I flicked on Larry King Live.  There were 4 women on the show, speaking of self-worth.  Most had experienced trauma in their lives and then in a moment of clarity or enlightenment, they did something to take hold of their own power and change the direction their life took.  Then, Deepak Chopra came on who has always ascertained that if women were running this world, the feminine power would NOT have created the mess our globe is now experiencing; financially, ecologically, war torn...it just wouldn't have happened.  I went out and purchased a pile of books so I could get back to my own core which is learning, being and experiencing.  So, what sings to me now?  I like books that make me think, make me happy and help me understand.  I purchased Robin Sharma's "The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari" (it's 10 years old and I've wanted to read it for years).  It is a remarkable story about living your dreams.  I got a Frommer's Venice day by day.  We are taking the boys to Italy this year and the Frommer's descriptions and summaries of cities is the best around.  Plus it has maps!  Alexander Mccall Smith has a wonderful series called "the No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency"  Mma Precious Ramotswe is the central character.  She is a "traditionally built" woman who doles out practical advice to her small village in Botswana.  I love her, want to be her.  Finally, I grabbed a new John Grisham novel in paperback "The Appeal".  I love lawyer books...solving problems and seeing the twists and turns in a book. 

I think 4 books for now is enough; my goal every years is to read at least 50.  The taste is eclectic and diverse but also fun.  I'm glad this passion is back.

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

Jazzed by Kindness

I was musing the other day; do that quite often-read in the newspaper that the Toronto Star had done an experiment.  They distributed 20 wallets through-out the city with $47.13 cents, some identification and pictures of a family.  The goal was to see how many wallets would be returned.  There were wagers on this; some said 4 out of 20, some wagered 1/2 of the wallets would be returned.  At the writing of their article, a whopping 15 wallets had been returned, money intact and 2 calls for two others were pending.  That's a staggering return.  The comments from the kind souls were: "I took a look at that little family and realized someone may need ttc fare home" or "I had been a victim of identity theft and would not want it to happen to anyone else".  It was lovely and KIND.

Yesterday, I was at Tim Hortons. A woman rushed in, in an obvious hurry.  Suddenly she stopped and went back to help a blind man to the counter.  Once he had been settled, the cab driver waiting for him, came in to check on his progress and then gently guided the blind man into his cab.  KIND.

I'm one of two organizing a fundraiser for a Children's Breakfast program.  Yesterday, out of the blue, a woman of whom I buy cookies from (Churchill's on Millwood) called to offer a silent auction item of delectable goodies.  Out of the blue.  Bev Morris, you're KIND.

I toddled out to Milton to see my son yesterday.  He was overwhelmed by the daunting task of cleaning his home.  I had offered help a week ago but got busy myself.  It's funny; I can organize a home in about 2 hours.  There are others, my son included who feel just beseiged by the task.  Anyway, we went to the store at one point; everyon knows Skyler in Milton.  I was looking at something, then looked up and I saw my 6'1" son leaning down talking to a little boy.  He was lost in the store.  Sky brought him to the counter so he could find his mom and held his hand the whole time.  KIND.

I think we are really a society of good people; there are bad eggs, to be sure, but mostly GOOD AND KIND, from my experience.

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.

The GEESE are home; therefore, I declare, SPRING has arrived!

I saw them, those messy things that leave doo all over parks and take a run at you if they are angry.  They are however, my sign that Spring is around the corner.  Of course I'm talking about geese.  The beautiful V-formations travelled over me on 3 occasions this weekend while driving along the Gardiner Expressway.  That sight is spectacular.

The other reason I know IT is coming is that the area around Bayview and Eglinton, my  ole' stompin' ground, is flooded with walkers and stroller moms and joggers and well, people (and dogs).  It's difficult to dodge your car around the people even if you have the right of way, which apparently is never when you are a driver.They look at you as if you have done extreme ecological harm to the environment because today..you had to drive.  I am not a great driver.  The nickname in the family is Crash Junior (my dad was Crash Senior) however I do drive slowly which annoys the rage-a-holics and I am careful around people.  The area I fall down in when driving is stationary objects like posts and walls-very poor vision in this case.  In the past my bumped up car was a testament.  Right now, there are bumps but they were obtained by people who decided to hit me, then run away.  Oh, well...I'm alive to tell the tale. 

I'm cautiously optimistic but I do believe....SPRING has arrived!

Cheryl Bower

www.CherylBower.com

RE/MAX Hallmark Realty Ltd.